I had a therapy session today. The past few weeks have not been good for me in terms of being productive. I can describe like a baseball relief pitcher who gets the call as needed and doesn't quite get the job done. Maybe he gives up a couple of hits, gives up a run, or walks a batter he isn't supposed to. It isn't like he does a terrible job. In fact, he manages to keep his team ahead. But he knows he should be better!
So I have completed trainings on depression, parenting, as well as see clients in therapy for assorted problems and I have helped them...but...I could have done better. So what is eating at me?
Enter therapy. My therapist is well versed in the gender dysphoria issues. It became clear to me today that I have retreated, closing the closet door. It is time to go forward.
I need to explore and divulge who I am to those around me.
The other option is to stay silent, carry this need to be feminine within me and die with despair and unfulfillment. Is it fair to me and to those I love to live this way?
I plan to first contact a cousin who is emotionally close. She is the springboard leading to the others. Who is in the cast? mother who is 88; brother; wife; son,18; then cousins, aunt, and two uncles. My next therapy session is in a month...
